What does everyone love talking about? It’s no shock that everyone loves to talk about the things they do and what they are passionate about. Getting people to talk about themselves is simple and the easiest way to get anyone to like you. In his well-loved book “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, Dale Carnegie said, “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”
This great advice applies to all ages and situations.
I have an incredible aunt who has become quite good at this. She is admired by everyone who meets her, and many people think of her as a good friend. How does she do it? She gets people talking about themselves. She asks the kind of questions that make people open up. Then she sits back and listens. Was she always this way? No, this is a skill that she developed over time, just as we can.
Teenagers are often insecure about their flaws and lack the confidence needed to make new friends. Surrounded by strangers, like when you’re the new kid at school or trying out for a sports team with none of your friends, it’s often hard to know how to start a conversation.
Teens are not the only ones who feel insecure. At every age it is normal to feel apprehensive in a scary situation. The secret is not to worry if other people will like you of not, but to worry about them. Everyone loves to feel good about themselves, to feel appreciated, and loved. When people feel important because you are interested in them, they will be interested in you.
Another way to make friends is to smile. Scientifically, when someone smiles it triggers a small endorphin release in the brain, making them feel happy and good about themselves. These feelings can bring you confidence. When smiling, someone looks the kindest and most attractive. If you smile, without even introducing yourself, you seem friendly and cheerful.
It has been said that a smile is the most powerful accessory anyone can wear.
Before I even met a guy who now has become one of my really good friends, I wanted to get to know him because I noticed how friendly and cheerful he was. I didn’t know this from his actions or from other people, but assumed it was true because of his ready smile.
So the next time a chance arises to make a new friend, simply make eye contact, smile, introduce yourself, and ask the soon to be friend about their interests.
Then listen carefully and watch your friendship unfold.