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Winter makes its presence known at Birch Ridge Golf Course

Posted: September 8, 2011 - 2:56pm

Winter made its presence known this past week by knocking down a number of trees on the golf course, making my chain saw-loving, pyromaniac father extremely happy.

One of the trees, a birch to the right of green No. 6, was an unfortunate loss, but the rest weren't in relevant locations unless you spray the ball all over the map.

The dreary, cold weather has slowed things down quite a bit at the golf course, but hopefully Mother Nature will provide golfers with a handful of sunny days this month.

As much as it saddens me, as I have thoroughly enjoyed writing this column, especially since I got some ginger snap cookies from Linda Cusack out of the deal, this will be my last rendition. I'm heading to Las Vegas for the winter next week.

As a final request I ask this of you, the loyal reader: When winter is at its absolute harshest and summer seems so far, far away, I want you to picture me, by a pool, under the warm sun, surrounded by beautiful, scantily clad women, after a great day on the golf course with a margarita in my hand.

I want you to find satisfaction in knowing that at least someone in the vast expanses of our world is happy. That someone will be me. See you next summer.

Senior League
Seventeen seniors made a right turn at the golf course to arrive just in time for another week of exhilarating Senior Tour action.

Remember seniors, if you turn left you'll be playing rounds of a very different nature. Don't turn left.

Being blessed with so much experience, our seniors didn't use tape measurers for closest to the pins this week. Instead they guessed the distance.

Chuck "Easy" Rider captured both prizes, landing his rock within 10 feet of the cup on No. 6 and inside 7 feet at the eighth. John "The Last DJ" Davis rolled in the long putt at the ninth and Tom Boedecker posted the low score with a sparkling net 31.

Senior league play will continue next week at 10 a.m. Monday.

Since this is my last column for the year I want to take a moment to announce the Birch Ridge Celebrity Panel Senior Tour Player of the Year Award. This year's award goes to a senior who truly dominated the field on a weekly basis. No tour has seen such a high level of play since Tiger Woods roamed the PGA Tour in the late 90s. Of course, Tiger wouldn't have similar success at Birch Ridge because he'd constantly make that left turn.

Nevertheless this year's MVP of the old guys is Chuck "Easy" Rider.

Tuesday Morning Ladies League
A bunch of women showed up Tuesday morning for unofficial play, but I wasn't really paying too much attention. Next topic please.

Tuesday Couples Night
Seven scandalous lovers participated in another week of couple's action. The format mirrored that of the Cold Weather Classic that will be held on Sept. 24. The net scores of the top teams were very close.

Darrell "Cool as the Other Side of the Pillow" Jelsma teamed up with his wife, Susan, to take first-place honors with a net 31.75. The Jelsmas edged out the wonderfully wacky Weimers, Sir Charles and Lore, by .25 strokes.

Tom and Tanya Boedecker finished in a distant third, .75 strokes behind. Poe Hussey provided the post-round entertainment. Myrna "Mrs. Boss" Cowan and Carol Hussey supplied the snacks.

Remember couples, next week play will begin at 5:30 p.m. for the remainder of the golf season. Please call and sign up before noon Tuesday.

B&B Classic
The B&B Classic is Sunday. The tournament has become an entertaining contest between players of both courses and the winning side takes home the "Travelling Trophy".

Sadly, I'm not allowed to play in this event despite other professionals being welcome. Of all the places sports have taken me, and there are many, I have found the Kenai Peninsula to be the only place that discourages ability.

So I won't be joining you, but I encourage our golfers to play and represent Birch Ridge well. Golfers can form their own team of A-B-C-D players. The deadline to sign up is 6 p.m. Friday.

Birch Ridge Golf Committees Officially Unofficial Golf Rankings
Webb Simpson won last week's Deutsche Bank in Boston in a thrilling playoff over Chez Reavie. Luke Donald's consistent play sends him back to the top of the celebrity panel's rankings. Jason Day gets a slight bump as well with some solid finishes the last two weeks.

1. Luke Donald; 2. Rory McIlroy; 3. Adam Scott; 4. Charl Schwartzel; 5. Lee Westwood; 6. Jason Day; 7. Dustin Johnson; 8. Keegan Bradley; 9. Steve Stricker; 10. Ricky Fowler.

Golf Trivia
Answer from last week: Mighty Mike Austin recorded a drive of 515 yards. Wow.

Question: No questions this week. I won't be here to answer it. Later, Gators.

 

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