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Birch Ridge golf report: Junior tourney results

Posted: June 14, 2012 - 7:06pm

Another season of junior camps are winding down at Birch Ridge Golf Course. We’ve seen 24 little duffers bloom into 50 from last week’s “Hook a Kid” program to our own Junior Camp this week.

This afternoon we concluded our Birch Ridge Junior Championships and had a nice little assortment of hot dogs, chips and root beer floats for the kids to engulf after their round. Tyler “You Can’t Sink My” Yamada, Parker Pickett, Shane “Future as Bright as The” Sunberg, Emily Sverdrup and Danica “Don’t Call Me Patrick” Schmidt were this year’s champions in their respective age groups. 

This year’s camps and tournament were a blast for all of us involved. I know I speak for everyone when I say that we love these two weeks of the summer. It’s great to see the kids out here at the golf course finding joy in something that we’re all so passionate about.

This is my fourth summer back in Soldotna assisting with these camps and it’s been better every year. The kids this year were especially well-behaved, respectful and just a pleasure to be around. I think Aaron Dexheimer and I had the 7- to 9-year-olds run about a half marathon this week, but hey, it’s hard to be the pros in golf contests!

I was especially impressed that when given the choice between sugary snacks and vegetables a lot of kids chose vegetables. I couldn’t believe it. Good job parents! I even ate some cauliflower to illustrate just how delicious it is, and I hate cauliflower. 

Senior League

Twenty-one veteran ball hounds arrived in all their glory Monday morning for a highly anticipated showdown featuring many of the Kenai Peninsula’s greatest champions. Frank “The Tank” Harper and Dan “The Mort Report” Mortensen tied for first place with dueling net 30s. Ed “Mr.” Robinson smoothly lofted his ball to within 50 feet of the cup for closest to at the sixth, and John “The Last DJ” Davis waltzed his way within 13 feet of the cup at the eighth besting the competition. Ray “Captain Cohoe” Hamby had the long putt at the finishing hole with a 50-foot bomb. 

Tuesday Morning Ladies League

The smoking hot babes of Birch Ridge were on display again this Tuesday morning. Once all the guys were done ogling, the ladies were able to get out on the golf course to hit some shots. Leona “Hot for Trot” Jackson won low gross again this week. Denise “Rock Your Socks Off” Cox continued her sterling play taking low-net honors. Leona also had the best poker hand, whatever that means. 

Tournament Update

This year’s June Scramble format is changing. The entire tournament will be handicapped with the lowest handicapper receiving 50 percent of his/her handicap and all other players will receive 10 percent of their handicap. This was done to allow more teams to compete on a level playing field. If you’re interested you can sign up as late as Friday at 5:30 p.m. at the VFW hall.

Golf Joke of the Week aka Space Filler

A man is getting married, and he’s standing by his lovely bride at the church. Next to him are his golf clubs and bag. His bride whispers in his ear: “What are your golf clubs doing here?” The man replied “This is not going to take all day is it?”

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