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There’s no such thing as bad weather; just bad golf

Posted: September 5, 2012 - 7:56pm

There’s not much positive to say about September. Football season is getting under way. Other than that the month just signals that summer is coming to an end. I spent last weekend up in Anchorage playing in the Eagleglen Open. It was there that I realized if my breathe travels longer than one club length I probably shouldn’t be golfing. It’s discouraging.
The golf course is still in great condition. There’s lot of good golf to be played, but when the wind is blowing and it’s raining sideways like it was last night it doesn’t take much to talk yourself out of playing. With winter coming it’s time for all us to put our big boy golf pants on, toughen up, and play some golf! I’m about to do just that in a few minutes. Please God don’t rain!
Riveting Senior League Action
Eight men old enough to remember when the wheel was invented rolled out to Birch Ridge for a rare Tuesday morning showdown. Numbers were low this week presumably because seniors despise change. They want to play on Monday! Labor Day schmabor day they said! I’m just making that up. It’s September in Alaska, I have to come up with something to take up space. Pat McElroy did what he does best in crushing the competition with a net 32. Earl “The Pearl” Matthis hit a jewel of a shot at the sixth for closest to honors. “Captain Cohoe” Ray Hamby had the long putt at the ninth. There was a closest to awarded at the eighth, but at least one golf ball had to come to rest on the green to qualify. That didn’t happen. Ray Hamby did chip in for a par though. Good job, Ray.
Tuesday Morning Ladies League
The ladies are still coming out Tuesday morning despite the increasingly cold, blustery, weather. I could recap everyone’s accomplishments, but who cares? Let’s talk about Margaret Stanley. Margaret claimed she knew how to party before the round and boy did she prove it out on the course. She blew the field away with a gross 39! Her round included two birdies! That’s just downright sexy.
Tuesday Couples Night
Not much can stand between our couples and steamy golf action Tuesday nights at 6:00 pm. Mother Nature is one of the rare exceptions. The couples were rained out last night. Bummer. We’ll try it again next week!
Golf Joke of the Week
A wife asks her husband, “Honey, if I died, would you re-marry?”
“After a considerable period of grieving, I guess I would,” he replied. “We all need companionship”.
“If I died and you re-married,” the wife asks, “would she live in this house?”
“We’ve spent a lot of money getting this house just the way we want it. I’m not going to get rid of my house. So I guess she would”.
“If I died and you re-married, and she lived in this house,” the wife asks, “would she sleep in our bed?”
“Well, the bed is brand new, and it cost us $2,000. It’s going to last a long time, so I guess she would”.
“If I died and you re-married, and she lived in this house and slept in our bed, would she use my golf clubs?”
“No!” the husband replies. “She’s left-handed”.

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