Birch Ridge golf course is beckoning

Brrrr! What in tarnation is going on around here? Does the Earth know that our calendars are nearing the end of May? That winter is supposed to be over? I can see Wile B. Engberg Super Genius watering the ninth green from the pro-shop window and I’m confident the water is freezing before it hits the green. That’s how cold it is. Can we get a refund on May?

 

Fortunately, the golf course is finally firming up enough to get power carts around all nine holes. We’ll have carts on the course for Memorial Day weekend. I know some of you will be thrilled to hear that. We’ll also be back on the eighth green.

The Birch Ridge Golf Association Junior Golf Camp is scheduled for June 10 to 14. This camp is open to all junior golfers. Camp information and registration forms can be found on our website www.birchridgegolf.com.

Riveting Senior League Action

A handful of seniors wandered out from hibernation for senior league play Monday morning. Would they remember where the first tee was after a long, cold winter? “Captain Cohoe” Ray Hamby did what all great leaders of men do, uplifting the spirits of his fellow competitors. Ray shot the worst gross and net score ensuring that only he would suffer the indignity of defeat. The seniors will be back at it next Monday.

Tuesday Morning Ladies League

The lovely ladies of Birch Ridge skipped and frolicked their way around the golf course in a dazzling display of dexterity and determination Tuesday morning. Tanya “Tiny Dancer” Boedecker emerged victorious with the help of a chip in at the seventh. Beth Roseberry captured closest-to honors and everyone thanked Denise Cox for participating on this chilly morning.

Golf Joke of the Week

Jesus and Moses are playing golf. On the par-3 fifth hole, a shot over water to an island green, Moses hits his 6-iron and it lands right next to the pin. After complimenting Moses on a fine shot, Jesus takes out his 7-iron and tees up a ball.

Moses says: “The 7 isn’t enough club. It’ll go in the water.”

Jesus replies: “If Tiger Woods can do it, I can do it.”

Jesus swings the 7-iron and sure enough the ball falls right in the drink. He tees up a second ball with the 7-iron still in his hand.

Moses reminds him of his previous attempt and Jesus again says, “If Tiger Woods can do it, I can do it.” Splash! Right in the water again! Jesus continues until he has hit all his golf balls into the water. At this point, he begins walking out on the water looking down to locate his lost golf balls. The foursome behind them approaches the tee, spots Jesus out on the lake, and says to Moses, “Hey, who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?”

Moses replies, “No, Tiger Woods.”

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