“Dollar” Bill Engberg and his merry band of mowers continue to keep the golf course in great condition, and there’s no better time for golfers to roll the rock on these greens than this upcoming weekend! We have a lull in the tournament calendar leaving next weekend wide open for public play. If you have had your fill of scrambles recently and just want to get out and play your own ball now is a great time to do it.
“Dollar” Bill has ramped up his efforts in promoting miniature duffer golf by hosting advanced clinics each morning for some of the more talented youngsters on the course. These kids can play! The kids are getting ready for the state championship in Anchorage held in early August. The Birch Ridge Golf Association has done a wonderful job supporting these kids all summer. In addition to the camps we held in June, all the participants have been able to play for free on Thursdays because of the BRGA.
When I was a miniature duffer out here, a long time ago in a galaxy far away, Birch Ridge had a number of high level juniors. I played countless rounds with Tony Azzara, Nick Horn, Matt Matarrese, Zac Cowan, Josh Lansing, Brennan and Taylor Jackson, Aaron Dexheimer and many others, all of whom turned out to be excellent players. We’re about to enter another era of great junior golf. Some of the kids we have now are really good and they’re just getting started in golf. It’s exciting to see and certainly something the golf course promotes as much as possible.
I’m biased of course, but I can’t think of a better sport to get a child involved in than golf. I love football as much as anyone ... I’m the self-appointed president of the Russell Wilson fan club. Seahawks!! But 99 percent of kids out there are done playing football after high school. I used to play a decent game of basketball, but now I’m sucking wind after two trips up the court. You can enjoy golf your entire life.
OK ... I’ll jump off the junior golf soapbox. Let’s talk old people golf.
Riveting Senior League Action
Thirteen grizzled veterans waged war against the mosquitoes Monday morning. John “The Last DJ” Davis played a ball-striking melody so beautiful his opponents were left in awe as he won the day with a 30 net. Ray “Ham and Eggs” Hamby hit a delicious shot close to the hole at the sixth for closest-to honors. “Slim” Jim Bennett had the best shot at the eighth. Sid “Vicious” Cox rolled in the long putt on the final hole, a result that can only be described as a miracle.
Tuesday Morning Ladies League
The boys couldn’t keep their golf balls in play when the scintillatingly sultry women of Birch Ridge arrived Tuesday morning with a little extra waggle in their game. Denise “Rock your Socks” Cox won closest-to-the-pin honors, lacing a golf shot closer to the hole than any other lady. Margaret Stanley came away with the grand prize of low net. Chiya “Pet” Bazan and Denise Cox tied for low gross. Chiya also won the ultracompetitive mystery hole.
Tuesday Night Couples
The lovers were out enjoying the weather Tuesday evening, which is a good thing because the golf for some wasn’t so pleasant. Gene “A Ladies Dream” Diamond claimed he lost five golf balls in the first four holes! That’s not conducive to low scores. The couples played a game I titled “For Better or Worse.” On even holes lovers recorded their best ball. On odd holes they recorded their worst. Dave and Sharon Keating proved to have the most stable relationship en route to a winning score of 33 net. Pat “Holy Roller” Cowan paired with his beautiful bride Myrna “Mrs. Boss” Cowan for a second-place finish.
Golf Joke of the Week
Things you may hear a golfer say ...
I wish I could play my normal game ... just once.
Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.
An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.
The best wood in most golfer’s bags is the pencil.
To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly.
A “gimme” can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers ... neither of whom can putt very well.