I see where Arnold "Terminator" Schwar-zenegger has not ruled out a gubernatorial run in California next year. On Tuesday, Arnold said he wasn't going to run, since he had too many film and family commitments, But Thursday, his publicist said her client will make up his mind in the next few months. This is just great. All we need is another Jesse "The Body" Ventura running a state.
Arnie, as he's known to those of us who like to call him that, is a conservative, even though he is married to Maria Shriver, a very liberal woman from the most noted liberal family in American history, the Kennedy clan. If he ran, he would be trying to unseat Demo-cratic Gov. Gray Davis.
I saw Arnie last summer in Dillingham. He flew in, only to hop on a floatplane to fly out to do some sport fishing up the lakes. People didn't recognize him at first in the terminal because he is the height of the Artist Currently Known As Prince divided by the height of Tom Cruise, only twice their width.
But he is charming. Nothing like having been a soldier in the army of a Eastern European country to make you all fuzzy-wuzzy. He's very involved with the Special Olympics, appearing at the World Winter Games which wrap up today in Anchorage. He heard of the Special Olympics from his wife, who is the daughter of the woman who founded it, Eunice Kennedy Shriver.
I think this gives Arnie the the edge over The Body, whose main claim to fame is he wore a pink feather boa when he was a color commentator for World Wrestling Federation matches.
Which brings us to today's movie trivia quiz puzzler question: What, besides being aging muscle-bound monosyllabic wannabe politicians, do Arnie and Jesse have in common? Hint: It's a movie (see answer below).
Ah, Arnold in office, I can see it now: The Arnold is before California legislators giving his state of the state address when he momentarily excuses himself, saying "I'll be bach," his famous line from the first "Terminator," and then every single other movie he's ever done. It's so precious.
When he returns, he'll be screaming, "I'll teach you to override my veto, you maggots!!!" as he swings through the Capitol on a vine, wielding a Mac-10 submachine gun.
OK, that may be far-fetched, but if he
doesn't run for governor, that would make a great scene in a remake of Jimmy Stewart film, "Mr. Smith goes to Washington." Perhaps: "Herr Schwarzenegger geht nach Wien," (Mr. Schwarzenegger goes to Vienna).
"Bach," by the way, is Arnoldspeak for "back," which reminds me of my favorite bad Schwarzenegger joke: A director comes to Arnold and says he can play any one of the great composers he wants to in an upcoming film. Arnold replies, "I'll be Bach." Get it? I know, I know. But I digress.
Celebrity-types aren't new to politics. Of course, there is The Body, but before him there was Sonny Bono, who was mayor of Palm Springs, Calif., and later a congressman. Also in Congress was Nancy Kulp, (Miss Hathaway on the "Beverly Hillbillies"), and Fred Grandy, (yeoman-purser Gopher Smith on the "Love Boat"). And, of course, you know that television circus master Jerry Springer was mayor of Cleveland, Ohio, don't you?
All of this makes me think: Can this happen in Alaska? Will we some day see Anchorage Mayor Mr. Whitekeys? Rep. Herb Shaindlin? Gov. Jackie Purcell? We can only, um, hope.
By the way, the answer to the movie trivia quiz puzzler question is: The movie "Preda-tor," in which both Schwarzenegger and Ventura appeared.
Jay Barrett is a reporter and photographer for the Peninsula Clarion.
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