Genuine Alaska woman takes on Alaskan Men magazine
For the last several years, the first thing I do in the morning is read our local newspaper from front to back. I have always enjoyed finding out just what is going on in our community.
I especially enjoy the "Letters to the Editor" column.
Some of the articles have made me sad or mad, but mostly they have given my sense of humor a real work out.
I like the fact that we Alaskans have such strong opinions and are not shy about expressing them on just about everything. However, I have never felt the urge to submit anything until now.
It may seem unimportant to you, but this has vexed me from the time it came out. I am talking about the Alaskan Men magazine, which has women all over the United States drooling over and sending hopeful, "please take me" letters to these handsome, rugged, Alaskan hunks.
But, as a longtime Alaskan woman, I am just wondering where all these wonderful "babes" in the woods are, and why the women of Alaska have not scooped them up?
I decided to do some purely scientific research as to why these Alaskan men were seeking mates outside of Alaska. I started out by reading all of the information printed about those wonderful hunks in the pictures, and soon the answer to my burning question was popping out.
When an Alaskan man says "Cabin in the woods," women in the Lower 48 think, "ski lodge, warm cuddling in front of a log fire on a bear skin rug, with a glass of fine wine while soft snowflakes fall gently to earth, while things leisurely progress to church bells ringing and fireworks for the rest of their lives with these rugged "all man" hunks.
Now, an Alaskan woman knows that what that Alaskan man really means is, a one-room cabin with plastic in the windows, 40 below plus and she is the one who chops the wood, builds the fire, cooks over it and has probably had to shoot the damn bear, skin it and make it into a rug when it tried to join her in the cabin while her "all-Alaskan Hunk" is out training his sled dog team or running his trap lines.
As for that glass of wine? Well, she just might get to drink it as she watches the flames dance in the fireplace, occasionally casting loving glances at her Alaskan Man, who is sitting on that damn bear rug grooming his lead sled dog and drinking Alaskan beer.
There are lots of single, beautiful, caring, resourceful, intelligent "Alaskan Women" right under those "Alaskan Men's noses. Maybe, the reason they don't see them is that, as Alaskan women, we know our Alaska and our men well. We meet them as equals on all levels, including winning a few sled dog races.
So, ladies, shall we start our own "Alaskan Women" magazine and see what shakes out for us, since in the whole state of Alaska these men cannot find a woman who "meets" their requirements for a mate? Wait till these Alaskan men see my list of requirements.
Think they will make the cut?
Peninsula Clarion ©2013. All Rights Reserved.